Creating Successful Holiday Mealtimes with Children
As the holidays approach, eating and mealtime are typically put front and center. Sharing food, sitting around a table, and spending time with loved ones is what this time of year is about. It is meant be full of love and joy—but is not always that way if you’re sharing meals with a child with feeding challenges. Here are some ideas that may help create a more positive experience, during the holidays and every day.
Consistent Structure
Our society places meals at the center of most social experiences. We can also create this experience during daily meals, even if it is just you and your child. Creating structure can involve sitting together to share a meal with your child without any distractions. This is an opportunity to turn off the television, keep toys off the table and sit with each other. Your child may not yet carry a conversation, but you can talk to them about the food’s taste, texture, smell, or about your day! Once you’re seated together, encourage independence—let your child feed herself, even if it is a little messy, or let her put food on her own plate, even if it is more than you think she will eat. As a parent, it is your responsibility to provide what to eat, when to eat and where to eat; it’s your child’s responsibility to determine whether to eat or not and how much to eat.
Establish Routine
Children thrive on routine to participate in activities because it is predictable, comforting and allows for exploration. You can establish routine around mealtimes with a consistent beginning and end activity such as washing hands, putting dirty dishes in the sink, or placing food in an “all done bowl.” As a general guide, typical meals last between 15-30 minutes; you can set a timer to encourage consistent timing and focus on eating. When the timer goes off, eating is finished—for now. Leaving time between meals/snacks is important for children to learn hunger and satiety cues. These are the feelings that tell us when we are hungry versus full. If children eat for extended periods of time, and/or graze in between meals, they may not feel hungry at meals which can result in the meal feeling less successful. When meal routines are established throughout the day, your child will know that there will be another opportunity to eat soon.
Exposure to Variety
As a general rule, 80% of the food at a meal should be easily consumed and enjoyed by your child. This leaves room for exposure to new foods during each meal. You can consistently place new foods on the table and on your child’s plate so they have the opportunity to try it, if they wish. If this food leaves the meal untouched, do not be discouraged, keep offering it at other meals. Children require repeated exposure to foods before they may realize it is of interest to them, and then they may need continued exposure to taste and determine it is a food they enjoy. In addition, if there is consistently variety offered, children will likely become more comfortable with exposure to new foods at holidays or other meals.
Even if the setting of a holiday mealtime changes, structure, routine and variety remain possible. Remember, as the parent, you provide what to eat, when to eat and where to eat and your child decides whether to eat or not and how much. If you continue to have concerns or challenges with mealtime and eating, please reach out to a professional such as a speech language pathologist or occupational therapist.
*Adapted from the Merry Mealtime Guide created by Nina Ayd Johanson of Food Smart Kids, LLC.